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Friends or Enemies

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FullSizeRenderI have a bad past of people acting like friends then turning on me. I have stories about people trying to stab me in the back. I usually find out that they aren’t true friends. People don’t usually realize that I hear a lot. I see a lot. I know a lot.

They fear that I will find out their plan to stab me in the back. They fear what I could do if I found out. I don’t do anything. I try and make amends, but they continue their plan after they agree.

I had a friend, ninth grade, that I thought that together we could take the world. She thought that too. We were stuck to each others side. After a while she meet other people and then I meet another group, my real friends.

This girl who I was friends with was bad mouthing me to the group that she had “found”. The funny thing is. I was friends with the entire group. The group that she thought she was turning was the group that I had behind my back.

Throughout the school year she drifted and found another group. Then again she tried to turn them on me. Jokes on her I had friends within that group. I’ve never seen someone, who had no reason to do to turn people on me, try so hard to get a school to hate me. Maybe she was apart of the group from before, I talked about this in the blog post Trust.

I don’t know what turned this girl to hate me. I had hoped that it was a just a faze. I had hoped that the person who was like a sister to me would see what she was doing. She was tearing people apart without even knowing.

I’ve learned that people can turn at the flip of a switch. I’ve learned to protect myself.

I’ve learned that I am my own worst enemy. I’m better with animals. I’m better by myself.

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Trust

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I have trust issues. They really started to kick in last school year as a freshman in high school. I had a good group of friends in the beginning we were in field marching we all had the same interests. Then one day they just stopped talking to me and including me in things. Naturally I went and asked why and then this whole feud over Canvas messaging started. For those who don’t know Canvas was what my old school used for classes and posting assignments and the messaging was just like the facebook messenger.

So I was talking to the “ringleader” of the group and she told me it was because I was mistreating everyone in the group, which I had her elaborate on and she gave me false information. Everything she gave me as “proof” was stuff that me and the other girl, that the arguments were with, and settled down and got on an agreement. So after a while we all became friends again except for me and the “ringleader”. The rest of the group and I would hang out after school while we were waiting for rides.

Turns out they were only trying to get close to me so they could get to my sister for the “ringleader” would have a better shot for drumline. The “ringleader” I will tell you that we have had our differences in the past and I overlooked them because I actually thought that she want ed to be my friend. I then started to ignore them and then they started the rumors. They would say that the only reason I was in band was because of my sister, which is false I am in band because I enjoy it.

They came up with all these awful things about me and I couldn’t take it. The new group of friends I was hanging out with started to fight back with me and then we got a small feud going between these groups. As of right now being in a new school and having old friends back I’ve been careful with who I hang out with. I’ve been getting better about who I think is a friend and who is using me.

I’ve learned my lesson. I’m an open book, but a closed friend. It takes time to get to know the real me. It takes time to know my past mistakes.